What TEDx taught me about becoming someone worth listening to
When I was speaker coach for TEDx Christchurch, we had a problem most people never saw from the outside.
We had to find speakers.
Not just people who could stand on a stage.
Not just people who wanted to speak.
People with ideas worth giving a stage to.
That distinction matters.
Because every year, people would approach us and say some version of:
“I’d love to speak at TEDx.”
Great.
What do you want to speak about?
“Anything.”
And that was usually the end of the conversation.
Not because they were bad people.
Not because they lacked potential.
But because they wanted the stage more than they had earned the idea.
That is one of the biggest mistakes aspiring speakers make.
They start with:
“How do I get booked?”
When the better question is:
“What problem do I solve so well that people would want me in front of their audience?”
Nobody is looking for another speaker.
They are looking for someone who can help an audience think, feel or act differently.
The stage is simply the vehicle.
Stop trying to be a speaker
A few days after I spoke to more than 750 real estate professionals at a conference, someone booked a consultation call with me.
He had been on stage before.
He enjoyed speaking.
He could see there was something in it.
But like many people at the beginning of that journey, he was trying to figure out how to turn occasional speaking into something more intentional.
I gave him the same advice I would give almost anyone starting out.
Stop trying to become a speaker.
Become known for solving one specific problem.
That sounds simple, but it is where most people get stuck.
They want to speak about leadership.
Or mindset.
Or motivation.
Or authenticity.
Or confidence.
Or business.
Those topics are too broad.
Conference organisers do not book broad.
They book useful.
They book specific.
They book people who can help their audience solve a problem they already care about.
So the question becomes:
What do you want people to be able to do after they have heard you speak?
Not feel.
Do.
“Feel inspired” is not enough.
Inspiration is wonderful, but if there is no follow-through, the talk disappears the moment the applause finishes.
A stronger question is:
By the end of this talk, what are three things the audience will be able to do differently?
That one question forces clarity.
It turns a vague topic into a useful session.
It turns a speaker into someone worth booking.
The market has changed
I had a conversation recently with the CEO of Celebrity Speakers New Zealand.
That conversation reaffirmed something I had believed for a long time.
The old model of professional speaking is changing.
For years, the conference circuit often relied on well-known names.
Former sportspeople.
Celebrities.
People who could tell a good story about teamwork, leadership or overcoming adversity.
There is still a place for that.
But the market is asking for more.
After speaking with their customer base, Celebrity Speakers were hearing the same thing I had been seeing in my own work.
Conference organisers are no longer just asking:
“Will this person inspire the room?”
They are asking:
“What will our people actually take away?”
That is an important shift.
The speakers who are becoming more valuable now are not always the most famous.
They are often subject matter experts who can turn their experience into practical, learnable outcomes.
That was refreshing to hear because it confirmed the direction I had already been taking with the speakers I coach.
Some of the people I have worked with have gone on to become Celebrity Speakers.
Not because they were simply interesting.
Because they had learned how to package their experience into something useful.
That is the point.
A professional talk is not just a story.
It is a story with a job to do.
Never speak for nothing
There is a lot of debate about whether people should speak for free.
My view is slightly different.
You may speak without a fee.
But you should never speak for nothing.
There is always an exchange.
Sometimes that exchange is money.
Sometimes it is professional video.
Sometimes it is photography.
Sometimes it is testimonials.
Sometimes it is a referral.
Sometimes it is access to an audience you genuinely want to build trust with.
Sometimes it is simply the chance to test and sharpen a talk before you take it to a bigger stage.
But there should always be something.
When I spoke at the real estate conference, I was paid.
But I also wanted the assets.
I wanted the professional video.
I wanted photographs.
I wanted the documentation that showed me on that stage, in front of that audience, doing the work.
Why?
Because those assets help the next organiser say yes.
Professional speakers do not just negotiate fees.
They negotiate credibility.
If you are early in your speaking journey and someone cannot pay you, that does not automatically mean you should say no.
But it does mean you should ask:
What will make this valuable?
Can I get video?
Can I get photographs?
Can I get a testimonial?
Can I get an introduction?
Can I collect proof that this talk landed?
If there is no fee, no footage, no photos, no testimonial, no audience fit and no strategic value, then you are probably not speaking for free.
You are just giving your work away.
There is a difference.
Build assets before you chase status
One of the first things I told Matt was to gather his assets.
If you have already spoken somewhere, do not let that moment disappear.
Find the video.
Ask for the photographs.
Collect the testimonial.
Save the programme.
Screenshot the social posts.
Ask the organiser for a few sentences about the impact of your session.
Most people forget to do this.
Then, months later, they think:
“I wish I had proof of that.”
If you want to become a professional speaker, proof matters.
A conference organiser wants to see that you can speak.
They want to see that you are not going to be hard work.
They want to see that an audience has already trusted you.
When we were looking for TEDx speakers, we wanted to see video.
Not because everyone needed to be perfect.
But because we needed to know what we were dealing with.
Could they hold a room?
Were they coachable?
Did they have something to say?
Were they a subject matter expert?
Could they be shaped into something strong?
That is what your assets do.
They reduce risk for the next person booking you.
One strong keynote is better than ten vague talks
Another mistake aspiring speakers make is trying to build too many talks too early.
They create a leadership talk.
A motivation talk.
A sales talk.
A culture talk.
A resilience talk.
A communication talk.
Then none of them become sharp enough to travel.
You are usually better to build one strong, repeatable keynote.
One talk with a clear audience, clear problem, clear promise and clear outcomes.
Get that right first.
Then build from there.
Comedians understand this.
They do not write a completely new hour every week.
They test material.
They sharpen it.
They perform it in smaller rooms.
They work out where the laugh lands, where the silence sits, where the audience drifts and where they lean in.
Speakers should think the same way.
Your keynote gets better by being delivered.
Not just written.
Delivered.
Tested.
Trimmed.
Improved.
Repeated.
If you want to become known, become known for something specific enough that people can repeat it to others.
“He speaks on leadership” is forgettable.
“He helps real estate leaders build teams without losing themselves” is much stronger.
Specific travels.
General disappears.
Preparation is the price of professionalism
One of the things I told Matt is that I give people a rough rule.
For every minute of important speaking content, expect around an hour of preparation for the content itself.
Then expect rehearsal on top of that.
That surprises people.
But it should not.
A 30-minute keynote is not 30 minutes of work.
It can easily be 30 hours of scripting, structuring, shaping, testing, trimming and refining.
Then comes delivery practice.
Where do you stand?
Where do you move?
Where do you pause?
Where do you speed up?
Where do you slow down?
Where does the story land?
Where does the audience need space to think?
That is the work.
That is also what separates professional speakers from people who simply enjoy talking.
One of the reasons I am cautious about people speaking for nothing is that it can create lazy preparation.
When there is no fee, no expectation and no real consequence, people can convince themselves that “good enough” is enough.
It is not.
Professional speaking is not professional because you get paid.
It is professional because of the standard you hold yourself to.
Impostor syndrome often sounds like too much content
Near the end of my conversation with Matt, we talked about something I see all the time.
Overloading content.
People do this for many reasons, but one of the biggest is impostor syndrome.
You feel like you need to prove you belong on stage.
So you add more.
More slides.
More examples.
More stories.
More detail.
More research.
More everything.
The logic is understandable.
“If I give them enough information, they will know I am credible.”
But that is not usually what happens.
What happens is the audience starts to drown.
Then they disengage.
Then you notice they are disengaging.
Then you think:
“They are not getting it. I better explain more.”
So you add even more.
But the problem was never that they needed more.
The problem was that they needed clearer.
Great speakers do not simply know what to say.
They know what to leave out.
That is why shorter talks are often harder than longer ones.
A six-minute talk can take longer to prepare than a 45-minute one because every sentence has to earn its place.
If you want to be a better speaker, do not ask:
“What else can I include?”
Ask:
“What can I remove so the message becomes sharper?”
Start where you already have credibility
Matt comes from real estate.
He has experience there.
He understands the industry.
He knows the people, the language, the problems and the pressure.
That matters.
A lot of aspiring speakers are too quick to leave the world where they already have credibility.
They want to go broad too soon.
But broad is usually earned after specific.
Start where people already believe you have the right to speak.
That might be your industry.
Your profession.
Your lived experience.
Your leadership journey.
Your technical expertise.
Your recovery.
Your research.
Your business story.
Start there.
Then expand once the message has proven it can travel.
If your idea is genuinely universal, it will eventually move beyond the first audience.
But do not skip the audience that already understands why you matter.
The real question
Most people ask:
“How do I become a professional speaker?”
I think the better question is:
“What do I know that could genuinely help an audience?”
Then:
“Who needs that help?”
Then:
“What would they be able to do differently after hearing me speak?”
Then:
“What proof do I have that I can deliver it?”
Then:
“Where can I test it?”
That is the path.
Not glamour.
Not waiting to be discovered.
Not hoping someone hands you a stage.
Professional speaking is built through usefulness, clarity, proof and repetition.
You become known by becoming consistently valuable.
You get booked because people can see the problem you solve.
You get rebooked because your talk creates outcomes, not just applause.
The stage is not the goal
The stage is not the goal.
The stage is where the work becomes visible.
If you only want the microphone, people will feel it.
If you genuinely want to help the audience see, do or become something different, they will feel that too.
That is what organisers are really looking for.
Not someone who wants to be seen.
Someone who has something worth seeing.
So if you want to become a professional speaker, start there.
Do not ask, “How do I get on more stages?”
Ask, “What idea have I earned the right to share?”
Then build the talk.
Collect the proof.
Practise the craft.
Refine the outcome.
Gather the assets.
Create the next opportunity.
And remember this:
Nobody becomes a professional speaker because they want to speak.
They become a professional speaker when other people decide their ideas are worth hearing.
