Executive presence is often misunderstood.
It is commonly framed as polish.
Refinement.
Control.
Saying the right thing in the right way at the right time.
For many leaders, this definition feels familiar. It rewards preparation, professionalism, and self-monitoring. It encourages leaders to present a version of themselves that feels safe and acceptable.
But polish is not presence.
Presence is not created by adding layers.
It is created by removing the ones that obscure connection.
The Myth of Polished Leadership
Polish is attractive because it appears controllable.
If you say less, you risk less.
If you regulate emotion, you avoid misinterpretation.
If you stay composed, you remain credible.
Early in a leadership career, this often works. Leaders are rewarded for clarity, restraint, and consistency. Over time, polish becomes habit, and habit becomes identity.
The problem is not that polish is wrong.
The problem is that polish without presence feels distant.
People can admire a leader and still feel disconnected from them.
Why Polishing Yourself Reduces Impact
When leaders focus too heavily on managing how they appear, attention turns inward.
Words are filtered.
Reactions are delayed.
Emotional expression is tightly managed.
The leader may look confident, but the interaction feels contained.
Teams sense this quickly. Conversations become careful. Feedback softens. Disagreement is muted. What remains is professionalism without emotional depth.
The leader is respected, but not fully trusted.
Presence Is Felt, Not Displayed
True executive presence is not something you perform.
It is something people experience.
Presence is the sense that a leader is grounded, emotionally available, clear without being rigid, and human without being exposed.
This kind of presence does not come from adding techniques. It comes from allowing more of the leader’s natural responses to be visible and regulated, not suppressed.
Revealing yourself does not mean oversharing.
It means being emotionally congruent.
The Risk Leaders Fear Most
Many leaders hesitate to reveal more of themselves for one reason:
Loss of control.
There is a concern that warmth reduces authority. That openness invites judgement. That authenticity weakens credibility.
In reality, the opposite is often true.
Leaders who are emotionally consistent and appropriately expressive feel safer to follow. Their reactions make sense. Their presence feels stable.
They are not unpredictable.
They are readable.
The Shift From Performance to Presence
Executive presence deepens when leaders stop asking, “How do I come across?”
And start asking, “What am I signalling right now?”
This shift moves attention outward. It anchors presence in awareness rather than performance. Leaders become less concerned with polish and more focused on impact.
Presence becomes something others experience, not something the leader manages.
A Moment for Reflection
What parts of yourself do you habitually smooth over?
Where do you hold back emotional expression to appear composed?
What might happen if you revealed slightly more, with intention?
Executive presence is not about being flawless.
It is about being fully present, without hiding behind polish.
